Long Time Gone

Seems to be my pattern, sometimes, and I'm not talking about bipolar. I have a lot to learn, and it's frustrating, because I feel like I would have been out learning these things much sooner if it weren't for bipolar. I haven't always been held accountable for my actions, which bothers me, because I never learned important lessons that I now have to figure out on my own. I'm really difficult to work with, sometimes, and I know that. It bothers me, but I never know how to fix it. I also know that I'm difficult to relate to sometimes, and even hard to be friends/in relationships with. It bothers me, but I do my best. I simply don't know what else to do.

The cedar is the national tree of Lebanon. I think Israel is trying to destroy Hezbollah, and not necessarily Lebanon, but they may blame Lebanon for housing Hezbollah. Lots of experts in the field, though, don't think that Lebanon's government has the power to control Hezbollah. I believe that's the case, especially if Iran is behind Hezbollah. I don't really think the Lebanese government is to blame, at this point. The Israeli minister to the UN told the Lebanese ambassador to the UN that he thinks Lebanon would be on Israel's side if it weren't for Hezbollah, or something to that effect. Poor Lebanon. They need a lot of help that I don't think they're going to get. Oh, and the US blocked a UN censure of Israel's actions. I really don't think there's a single piece of our foreign policy that makes sense to me.

From Chapter 1: Some of the evil of my tale may have been inherent in our circumstances. For years we lived anyhow with one another in the naked desert, under the indifferent heaven. By day the hot sun fermented us; and we were dizzied by the beating wind. At night we were stained by dew, and shamed into pettiness by the innumerable silences of stars. We were a self centred army without parade or gesture, devoted to freedom, the second of man's creeds, a purpose so ravenous that it devoured all our strength, a hope so transcendent that our earlier ambitions faded in its glare. As time went by our need to fight for the ideal increased to an unquestioning possession, riding with spur and rein over our doubts. Willy nilly it became a faith. We had sold ourselves into its slavery, manacled ourselves together in its chain-gang, bowed ourselves to serve its holiness with all our good and ill content. The mentality of ordinary human slaves is terrible - they have lost the world - and we h...

by T.E. Lawrence. "To S.A." I loved you, so I drew these tides of men into my hands and wrote my will across the sky in stars To earn you Freedom, the seven pillared worthy house, that your eyes might be shining for me When we came. Death seemed my servant on the road, till we were near and saw you waiting: When you smiled, and in sorrowful envy he outran me and took you apart: Into his quietness. Love, the way-weary, groped to your body, our brief wage ours for the moment Before earth's soft hand explored your shape, and the blind worms grew fat upon Your substance. Men prayed me that I set our work, the inviolate house, as a memory of you. But for fit monument I shattered it, unfinish...

Too little, too late, Rumsfeld. I hope your impromptu visit to Iraq was not a PR mission. If so, it's way too little, way too late. I would have started with sending enough troops in to secure Baghdad in the first place. Actually, no; let me back up. I would have listened to my military advisors before making any big decisions.

Kim Jong Il, Hugo Chavez, and Iran's president. I honestly don't know enough about Chavez to condemn him this way, so I'll do more research. Who am I leaving out, for the consolation prizes? Syria's president, probably, maybe Belarus's as well. Oh, and probably half of Africa's leaders. Idi Amin, anyone? Is he even still in power? Charles Taylor--isn't he the guy on trial for atrocities in his West African country, I believe? Whomever happens to be in charge of Somalia at the moment? Mohmar Khaddafi of Libya? He seems to have retired his saber awhile ago, though. Senility? Distracted by his all-female bodyguards who probably double as cheerleaders during political rallies and sporting events? Embarrassed at having been the only Middle Eastern leader (with nuke) to relinquish his nukes?

I'm watching a PBS show about the Medici family in the Italian Renaissance. Thank heavens for an hour of television that won't lower my IQ.