Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep

I cannot remember where I first heard this, but it's been rattling around in my head, so I finally looked it up. It's a beautiful child's prayer from the 18th century:

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.
If I should die before I wake,
I pray the Lord my soul to take.
[World Prayers]

It's quite beautiful, and simple. It reminds me of books I read, like "Goodnight Moon," and "The Little Prince" as a kid.

Doing yoga in my room at night reminds me of an important part of myself I thought I'd lost--movement. Realizing that I loved to dance is one of my earliest memories. Yoga reminds me just how much I miss it, and how naturally it comes to me. When I can't dance, it's like an entire language I can't speak. I'm also missing a wholeness and a sense of connectedness. I was so un-balanced and dis-placed by the trauma of the illness that so many parts of me were shuttered and abandoned. It's like they've been standing dark for years and it's so hard to recover them. Lots of willpower to force myself awake again.

It's so important that I spent most of today alone. I really needed it to digest everything that I've experienced lately. To catch up with myself, if you will. I've been away from my blog, and have missed it. I looked at lots of jobs on the "internets" tonight. I'm still timid about applying, but I have about 50 bookmarks in my web browser for jobs and job-related sites. Fingers crossed!

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