Conflict [Un]resolution

I'm conflicted about next semester. I really want to take five classes, because I've found five that really interest me and it's my last semester in college and I'd like to take full advantage of it, but at the same time I feel the need to spend as much time as possible preparing for the next phase of my life, i.e. graduation and finding a job and transitioning to the outside world.

I fear that I'm holding on to the past rather than letting go and embracing the future. I also want to get in shape next semester, and taking five classes would make that harder. On the other hand, one of the classes doesn't meet for most of the semester (the UN class actually goes to New York), which would allow for more room for a fifth class.

I'm conflicted. Another possibility is to take just 3.5 units so I could focus more fully on extra-curricular plans. There are so many classes I wish to take and so many languages. I'm hoping to get a Portuguese language tape from the library to pick up a few words. Heesh speaks Portuguese.

I'm watching the film "Joyeux Noel," which is about World War I, when on Christmas Eve the Germans and the Allies came out of their trenches to celebrate together, only to continue the massacre the day after.

I really want financial independence and I don't know if I should aim to get a job during the semester or if I should wait until graduation. Speaking of graduation, so many people want to come and I don't know what kind of party I want or where. Our current house isn't great for entertaining, which make me sad because our old house was great for parties. Lots going on in this big head of mine.

It interests me that how War II seems to have eclipsed War I in popular culture. War I has tons of stuff that I'd love to learn about, such as the various hatreds between enemies, as well as the poets who described their experiences in poignant terms. I think War I was a bit like Vietnam in that it was meaningless and disenchanting for the world--the first example of "total war."

Comments

j said…
I wandered here a while back, found it interesting (maybe because my mom has alzheimers and you'd mentioned something about your own family situation, I'm not sure) and then just rediscovered the link.

I think I'll check that movie out--the Christmas shared across the lines is one of the things that stuck with me most reading All Quiet on the Western Front.

best wishes for the holidays.

J.
QUASAR9 said…
Hi Valerie,
hope you had a great Xmas with family and friends, and are enjoying the festive holiday

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