Brought to You By the Letters S and C

"The pen is mightier than the sword, if you shoot that pen out of a gun. This is the Colbert Report!"

[Stephen points to a square with the "Head-On" commercial ad in it] "Apply directly to the forehead. Apply directly to the forehead. Apply directly to the forehead...This is the Colbert Report!"

"Here's the Truth you ordered! Watch out, the plate is very hot. This is the Colbert Report!"

"The culture war is like a bar fight and I'm your broken pool cue. This is the Colbert Report!"

"You don't have to be crazy to work here, but it helps me fire you! This is the Colbert Report!"
--Stephen Colbert

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