I Am Not a House of Cards

Though other people seem to think I am, sometimes. I have never "fit in." I have never not felt different. I don't know what it's like to blend in, to not be self-conscious, to not constantly think about how I can't relate to anyone around me. Except summer school, but that was fleeting. I felt invisible there, in a good way--one of the crowd, just like everyone else, and it changed my life. It gave me hope that that is possible, out there somewhere, and it's worth not giving up.

We are grounded tonight, since my car has a flat and no one else has a car. Bummer. Good thing we got out earlier today.

This one internship I've been trading phone calls with isn't sitting well with me. It's very political and a little pretentious--is there a theme among some non-profits of pretension? The person on the phone today used the word "shan't," which I've only ever heard from my British-influenced dad.

Comments

Diana said…
hi claire,

there is a terrible deficit of claire-ness here. we're also missing some other very important people. "we" constitutes lorien, of course, amina, eden, brenna...that's all who come to mind right now, of the original gang. come visit for a bit! we'd love to have you. i miss chara terribly. i don't think you met her. she and i were inseparable last semester. take good care, write whenever you wish.
10:49 PM
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